As you’ll recall from the Disney flick “20,000 Leagues Under The Sea,” one of the defensive features of the submarine Nautilus was the ability to electrify the outer surface. Thus when the sub was boarded by a bunch of cannibals while high-centered on a coral reef, Captain Nemo threw a switch and the invaders got electrozapped until they retreated off the boat.
Watching recent episodes of criminals in the street swarming cars and preventing them from proceeding, it occurs to me that the ability to flip a switch and electrify the outer panels of the vehicle might be a useful ability. Someone throws themselves onto your vehicle, you could gently persuade them with 50,000 volts of persuasion to get *off* your vehicle. Is this a practical possibility? Would it require so much modification so as to be essentially a whole new vehicle? I kinda think you’d have to have a non-conductive fiberglass skin with metal studs every few centimeters, each pair connected to a reduced-power version of a stun gun. Modern computer and sensor systems would allow the system to select which set of studs to electrify based on pressure; Tesla-level cameras and whatnot should allow the system to *see* where threats are and adjust the Dumbass Deflector accordingly. That seems like a whole lot of bother to go to, but as we start slipping deeper into the Cthulhu Era, this sort of thing might be more and more reasonable.
Alternatives to electrification:
- Skin panels that get real hot. 200F should probably do it. Energy intensive.
- Skin panels that vibrate unpleasantly. Probably noisy and heavy.
- Skin panels that “sweat.” Anything from simple water to skunk stank.
- Combine 1 and 4: skin panels that emit hot steam. This could be simplified with discrete emitters underneath or between panels. Especially around the front grill, which is where most of the problems lie anyway.
- Skin panels that project small, short points, like thumbtacks. Heavy again.
- Back to 3… but it sweats *glue.* If they’re going to plop themselves onto your car, making them stick there could prove entertaining, if probably illegal. But here’s the thing: if it’s illegal for *you* to detain them, why isn’t it illegal for them to detain *you*?
