Mar 242024
 

A few days ago someone on twitter repeated some nonsense that getting irritated about canon violations in, say, Star Trek was a sign that you’re kinda dumb, because canon is an impediment to writers who want to tell stories. Well, guess what: established canon is an impediment to only one kind of writer: the lazy kind.

 

Establishing canon can sometimes take a while. Take Star Trek: if you look at the early years, canon was quite mutable. Who did the crew of the Enterprise work for? It seemed to change from time to time. Starfleet, of course… but then also the United Earth Space Probe Agency and later the United Federation of Planets. Klingons went from shiny dark humans with a vaguely Soviet-style totalitarian dictatorship, to bumpy-headed high-tech barbarians with a focus on fun, honor and bloodshed. But these things are *now* well established, and have been literally for generations. Changing them is changing the established rules.

 

And the thing is, established rules are a *good* thing for storytellers. Yes, they constrain storytelling possibilities, but they force the storyteller to be cleverer than if the rules didn’t exist. And the *vast* majority of the time storytellers accept that rules are there and are good. Imagine what nonsense you’d get in a medical show where medicine had no relation to reality. Aspirin cures cancer. Broken bones are set with a smoldering look from Doctor Hearthrob. AIDS is cured by popping the infected into a microwave oven for three minutes on high. Two seasons back, Doctor Heartthrob won a Nobel Prize for curing Type 1 diabetes with a combination of oatmeal and Tea, Earl Gray, Hot. But now, Type 1 diabetes is wholly incurable and causes the sufferers to spontaneously combust with no reference to the prior treatments. This would be bafflingly stupid unless set as some sort of “Naked Gun” style absurdist comedy.

Imagine a legal/lawyer show where the law had no relation to real-world law. A cop show where cops could simply walk through walls, or where once confronted criminals instantly changed their ways. A western set in 1872 New Mexico with Nazis and an invasion of blimp-borne Samurai played straight, or where the cowboys dealt not only with cattle but an infestation of kangaroos and velociraptors. Come on, cowboys vs dinosaurs sounds fun, right? But if the show isn’t sci-fi or fantasy, having the cowboys, who pack Glocks and drink Bud Light from aluminum cans and ride carbon fiber racing bicycles, just wouldn’t make sense. A sitcom set in a penthouse apartment established as 60+ stories high overlooking Central Park, but the apartment door sometimes opens into the hallway, sometimes the elevator, sometimes the roof, sometimes right onto the street…and sometimes that street is in San Francisco or London. It’s either absurdist… or it’s lazy and stupid.

 

If you want to change the rules you’d best have a good reason. It can be done. Hell, “Young Sheldon” recently changed years of established “Big Bang Theory” canon in a smart way that made things not only make more sense, but made people happy. It was long ago established that as a child Sheldon Cooper had walked in on his dad cheating on his mom with another woman. The sight disturbed, upset and changed Sheldon, and ruined his view of his dad. In the “Young Sheldon” show, the dad has been portrayed as a great guy who was not the cheating type, though tempted from time to time. And they finally got to the moment: Sheldon walked in on Dad and Other Woman. But it turns out Other Woman was actually Mom, who was dressed up in a sort of cosplay. Sheldon simply didn’t recognize her. He misinterpreted. Canon has been changed without actually changing canon.

But the current crop of writers for Star trek, Star Wars, Doctor Who, Rings of Power, etc. do not seem to be either willing or able to navigate their way through established canon. And rather than write compelling, clever stories within the rules… they simply steamroll the rules, often for ideological reasons.

In Star Trek, it’s long established that 23rd century medicine is damn near magical in it’s ability to fix both physical and mental damage. So wouldn’t *have* characters who were delusional to the point of insanity, or trundling around the decks in a wheelchair. But in the name of Diversity, Equity and Inclusion, the fact of 23rd Century medicine is simply ignored in favor of The Message.

So you end up with this nonsense:

on

It adds nothing to the story to have Wheelchair Guy. It doesn’t make sense. It yeets the viewer right out of it if they consciously recognize that it’s wrong; if they don’t consciously recognize it, there is still the subtle, unconscious Uncanny Valley-esque sense of something being not right.

Canon isn’t a problem. Canon is *good.* If you don’t like the canon, if the canon gets in the way of the story you want to tell, there are good ways to deal with it:

1) Write a different story.

2) Change your canon-busting story to fit a different property. That apartment with the wacky door? Change it from straight sitcom to a Doctor Who offshoot.

3) Come up with a *clever* way to change the canon. You have a propulsion system vastly better than warp drive for your Star Trek ships? Great. Set it in the *future* of established Trek, not the past.

 Posted by at 2:24 pm
Feb 262024
 

Slightly over 4 years ago I yammered a bit about a game company called “Evil Hat” that was putting out a Lovecraftian game while not only hating Lovecraft but also *intentionally* not understanding the idea:

 

“I want your business”

Making a *huge* point about bashing the creator of the IP you’re squatting on, while misinterpreting the importance of some of the most basic elements, points out that you’re just wearing the fandom as a skinsuit, a way to squeeze some of that filthy lucre from the nerds. Something we’ve seen far too often from the likes of those running Star Trek, Star Wars, Dr. Who into the ground.

Anyway, the producers of that Cthulhu game are back with another IP-cash-grab, this time in the “Tomb raider” franchise. I’ve never played any of the games; this franchise is not my thing. But for those of you who care about it… let me know if they got it right.

Someone did some digging around and found out some stuff about some of the people behind the game…

Tumblr art, self-insert deviant weirdos. Sounds about right.

 Posted by at 6:29 pm
Jan 052024
 

United Nations moves to stop Alabama from carrying out America’s first nitrogen gas execution

“U.N. experts argue there has been no evidence to suggest that nitrogen gas would not “result in a painful and humiliating death.””

 

Oh FFS.  Nitrogen asphyxiation has been dangerous in industry specifically *because* it’s painless. If you find yourself in a volume filled with carbon dioxide – a small room, a tank of some kind, whatever – you are *instantly* going to know it. Your lungs will object, you’ll cough, you’ll hold your breath… and you’ll try to get the hell out of there. If you find yourself in a volume filled with *poison* gas, you’ll try to evacuate even faster. But nitrogen? You feel nothing. Your lungs are used to nitrogen… about 80% of every breath you take is nitrogen. You’ll continue to breathe it in, and continue to expel oxygen with each breath, rapidly getting rid of the oxygen in your blood as you continue to respire normally, until you rather quickly slip into a peaceful unconsciousness, and soon *die.*

 

All evidence points to nitrogen being a peaceful and painless way to go. And consequently one of the less humiliating, unless you find not thrashing about and screaming in pain and terror humiliating. I imagine the actual goal is to simply stop executions, rather than having any legitimate objection to nitrogen. Because if this is carried out and shown to be what history has shown it should be – effective and painless – other governments might adopt it. Given that unlike lethal injection it quires little skill – just strapping on a mask, rather than finding veins and jamming needles into them – and uses cheap and easily available nitrogen gas rather than difficult to obtain chemicals, nitrogen executions should be relatively inexpensive. One argument might be that this will incentivize bad governments to execute more; but bad governments have little trouble with just shooting people they don’t like. The counterpoint is that taxpayers shouldn’t be overly burdened if clearly easier alternatives are available.

 Posted by at 3:32 am
Dec 112023
 

Long story short: I’ve been a *casual* watcher of “Dr. Who” for 40+ years. From watching it from time to time on PBS back in the 80s – the Tom Baker era, mostly – to catching the revived version in more recent years, I would generally find it amusing if somewhat baffling. The fact that not only was it stories set over multiple episodes, meaning you’re in the dark if you’ve missed any, but that it was terribly *British* meant that it just didn’t quite hit for me. But still, I liked it well enough, and I respect the IP and the fandom.

But not everyone respects the IP or the fandom. This includes the makers of the show these days.

One thing I could always expect from any iteration of The Doctor would be that he was some flavor of “British Man.” Generally some variant of the Brit known as the “boffin,” a weird eccentric science type. But then came the “insufferably smug British woman” variant of the Doctor. And next up… gay sub-Saharan African Doctor, which seems to be meant specifically to annoy the long-time fans. So, yeah, I haven’t felt the urge to watch Dr. Who in a good long while. Recent events have not changed that. In fact, recent efforts by the makers of the show to gaslight fans of the show make me actively uninterested.

The latest nonsense has been the race swapping of historical figure Isaac Newton. For a British show to *intentionally* replace an important English historical figure with an Indian actor seems at best odd, at worst part of a wider ongoing and undeniable effort to replace the English within their own history. But the people behind this have themselves a new strategy to defend their decisions from those who don’t like it:

‘Doctor Who’ Casting Director Responds To Criticism Of Race-Swapped Isaac Newton: “It’s Sad That We’re In A Time Where People Villainise Minorities”

Behold: pointing out that Newton was English, or Cleopatra was Greek, or Hannibal was Phoenician, has gone from merely being a racist position to now “villainizing minorities.” If you say that so-and-so wasn’t black or Indian or whatever, you are now equating blacks or Indians or whatever with criminals. It is dishonest, it is unhinged, it doesn’t make sense, but it’s what they’ve got.

That’s their argument against those who point out the folly and malignity of race swapping historical figures. What’s their argument *for* doing this? The Dr. Who casting director says:

“It then becomes even more important to give people a voice and for people to be represented, especially for young people growing up who might be trans or from any minority. If they can see themselves on screen, then that can be a huge lifeline for some people. That can make them feel part of the world, which indeed they are.” … “Growing up as a gay man, I’m as aware as anybody else of how this stuff makes you feel when you see it. “

Uh-huh. So he likes to see his little subset “represented.” But he somehow doesn’t understand – or pretends not to – how a large *majority* of people do not like to watch their “representation” getting not just erased, but culturally appropriated and colonized by outsiders who didn’t earn it, don’t deserve it and don’t fit in it.

 Posted by at 6:27 pm
Nov 062023
 

I’ve long counseled American Jews to get armed and trained, because their “friends” on the political left will sooner or later throw them to the wolves. That day seems to be right about here, if not in fact yesterday.

Anyway, this happened today:

Several young kids escape injury after woman targets what she thought was an ‘Israel school’

One “Ruba Almaghtheh” rammed her car into the Indianapolis school, which had a single adult and four little kids in it. She damaged her car and scored herself attention and felony charges, but didn’t seem to actually injure anyone. Why’d she do it? Because it was the “Israelite School of Universal and Practical Knowledge,” and some people are kinda psycho in their hatred of Jews.

But here’s the kicker: the”Israelite School of Universal and Practical Knowledge” isn’t Jewish… it’s “Black Hebrew Israelites.” These are black supremacists who have culturally appropriated some texts, names, clothes and ideas, but are about as Jewish as the average Fed glowie advocating online for violent rebellion is actually a Trump supporter. In one of those fantastic “make it make sense” moments, they are an offshoot of the “Israelite Church of God in Jesus Christ.” They are so whackadoodle that even the Southern Poverty Law Center, which hates to even suggest that there can be such a thing as anti-white racism, has labeled them a hate group.

So… Palestine-supporters vs black supremacists? I want this show to go on for seven seasons and at least three movies.

And in other news, Palestine supporters are now outright murdering Israel supporters on American streets.

 

And in other news…

How Israel shot down a ballistic missile in space for the first time

Arrow missile-defence system took out rocket fired from Iran-backed Houthi rebels in Yemen outside of Earth’s atmosphere

Enemy missiles have been shot down before. Missiles in space have been shot down before. But this is the first time an enemy missile has been shot down in space.

 Posted by at 11:32 pm
Nov 032023
 

So they’re coming for the night sky, too:

The Magellanic Clouds must be renamed, astronomers say

Anything and everything to erase any mention of the people who built the world. The wokies want to rename the Magellanic Clouds because by modern standards Magellan was not a great guy. But you don’t see them wanting to rename anything named by the Sumerians or Babylonians or the Arabs, do you.

 Posted by at 3:04 pm
Oct 292023
 

Old-school antisemitism: not just for western leftists.

 

For the brain dead who think “this is an over-there problem, nothing to do with us,” the chumps who set off the Boston Marathon bombs back in 2013 were from, in part, Dagestan, and were of the same mindset as this jet-swarming mob.

 

 Posted by at 2:27 pm
Oct 082023
 

I don’t care if you don’t want to storm the streets to protest for Israel. But if you go out to celebrate Hamas intentionally murdering civilian men, women and children, celebrating the kidnap, rape, torture of women and children… you and I can’t be friends. There is no place for you out among the stars. Go wallow in the filth.

 

Note that these protests aren’t in the third world, but in western countries like Britain and the Netherlands and Canada and Australia. They are celebrating the intentional slaughter of families not dissimilar to yours. Those who would celebrate a thing, are not far from doing a thing. So keep that in mind the next time you hear a political debate on whether or not your country should allow in yet more military-age males from cultures that don’t like yours.

 

 

 Posted by at 11:59 am
Oct 072023
 

One of these words is not like the others. One of these words doesn’t belong.

MA in Magic and Occult Sciences

Well, kids, here’s a degree that will surely come in handy in the economy of tomorrow…

This is a flexible degree, which provides you the freedom to design you own course of study. Led by a team of faculty members across departments (see our “members” tab), an essential aspect of this programme is its interdisciplinarity.  Thus, the University of Exeter’s MA in Magic and Occult Science allows you to explore your specific interest within the long and diverse history of esotericism, witchcraft, ritual magic, occult sciences, divination, and related topics.

They keep using the word “science.” I do not think it means what they think it means.

But here’s where it gets spectacular:

By housing this program in the Institute of Arab and Islamic Studies, we place the Arabo-Islamic cultural heritage back where it belongs in the centre of these studies and in the history of the “West.” Decolonisation, the exploration of alternative epistemologies, feminism, and anti-racism are at the core of this programme. 

Oh yeah. I have *got* to see how this plays out. Is there any more entertaining matchup than “Islam” and “witchcraft?” Throw in “feminism,” and this looks to be *hilarious.*

 

 Posted by at 8:39 pm