CNN might have taken the top spot, but when their paid talking head started shrieking that Trump should resign, be impeached, arrested and imprisoned, I was busy not pointing my face at the TV and only heard it. So the below video where the narrator lists all the ways that SpaceX is going to destroy the planet with rocket launches – including dumping carbon black (?), chlorine (?!?) and aluminum oxide (?!!??!) into the upper atmosphere – takes the prize for today.

As part of the argument, the video includes a graphic showing that a single Falcon 9 flight consumes 147 metric tons of kerosene, meaning it dumps 150 times as much carbon dioxide into the atmosphere as a single transatlantic flight. But… does it? The range of such a flight is about 4,800 km. Modern jetliners consume around 3 liters of jet fuel – essentially kerosene – per 100 km per seat, or about 144 liters per seat per flight. 144 liters is about 115 kilograms. The 777 can carry about 350 passengers, so 350*115kg = 40.25 metric tons of fuel. Without running the terribly complex calculations, it seems to me that 147 metric tons is not 150 times greater than 40 metric tons. Granted, not doing the math on that means I fall into the Other Ways Of Knowing category of addlepated imbecile who thinks that math is a tool of the cisheteronormative whiteness patriarchy, but it’s late and I’m tired, and my spirit animal assures me that the planets are aligned just right in the zodiac so that I can make a guess about which number is bigger so long as I avoid integer shaming.

This dismal piece of gormless chickenshittery terminates with a plea to end space exploration and, in the words of three generations of absolutely genetically defective morons, focus our attention instead on the Earth.