First up: a writer for Gizmodo flips her lid over the terrifying prospect of the Defense Department generating ten whole watts of electrical power in space with a solar panel:

The Pentagon Sent a Pizza Box-Sized Solar Panel Into Space, But I’m Sure Everything Is Fine

This solar panel is officially called the Photovoltaic Radiofrequency Antenna Module (PRAM), and it’s designed to capture the powerful blue light in space that doesn’t pass through the atmosphere. Navy scientists launched it last May using a mysterious drone called the X-37B, and it’s currently circling the Earth every 90 minutes. So right now, as I’m typing, there is a little solar panel looping the planet because the Department of Defense wanted to put it there. Somehow, this is not an episode of the X-Files, it is real life. …

The scientists want to send dozens of these panels to orbit the Earth, and they say if they scale up the project, it could produce enough electricity to fuel a whole city. But as far as I can tell, no one has been clamoring for space power. Myself and the other 99.9% of humanity would be perfectly happy with solar, wind, and other clean energy generated right here on Earth.

If these Defense Department scientists successfully get more of these panels into orbit, there’s no telling what horrors the nation will use them for.

Nobody wants space-based solar power according to this genetic defective.

Huh.

Bonus round, from the color-value reversed version of “Stormfront,” The Root:

‘Be Less White’: Coca-Cola Faces Backlash for Giving Wypipo Wonderful Advice in Diversity Training Program

“Be less white.”

If it were up to me, this would be America’s motto. Instead of the Pledge of Allegiance, children in school should stand up before class, put their hands over their hearts and shout “BE LESS WHITE” at the flag for five minutes before beginning the day’s lessons. (I’m old AF and I have no idea if students even have to say the pledge before school anymore, but still.) “Be less white” should be printed on t-shirts, bumper stickers, white people’s birth certificates, white people’s tombstones and it should replace “In God We Trust” on the back of U.S. currency.

Uh-huh. Read the comments for an extra dose of “my god humans are stupid.”