First up:

Inmate punches inmate who wouldn’t pray with him

Short form: “Abdullah Abdullah” was *sure* another inmate at the Lancaster county Jail would pray with him. But when the other inmate said “No, I don’t want to (expletive) pray with you, so stop asking,” Abdullah displayed the caliber of judgement and rational thinking that got him tossed into the hoosegow in the first place, and decked the other guy.

Second up:

Hate crime is suspected after a gunman kills 3 white men in downtown Fresno

One  “Kori Ali Muhammad” decided that there’s a war between whites and black, so he murdered four white guys. Oddly enough, the cops decided very quickly that this just might maybe be a hate crime. Oh, and the story includes the Phrase That Pays.

Thirdly:

Cleveland murder suspect Steve Stephens kills himself after pursuit

Couldn’t have ended better.