With all the yammering yahoos yipping on about the War on Christmas and similar rubbish, I find it incredibly difficult to give a fart about Santa Claus’ ethnicity. Yes, “Saint Nick” is based on an actual person from what today is Turkey, so he probably would’ve been sorta olive-colored, like modern Greeks or Turks. But “Santa” is a product of northern Europe and Anglo-Saxon America and was pretty much as white as you can get. But you know what? I just can’t seem to generate any outrage when I see a Black Santa or a Hispanic Santa (or, theoretically, an oriental Santa or an Indian Santa or any other such thing that’s possible but that I don’t think I’ve ever seen). While I question the wisdom of teaching kids that there are magical beings who grant wishes (and, apparently, grant those wishes based upon the financial status of the family involved), once past that… shrug. I mean, come on… if we’re to accept that he can travel all the world in a night flying in a sleigh pulled by magic reindeer and can quantum teleport into peoples living rooms… changing ethnicity based on current conditions would seem an easy trick.

I am a bit confuzzled about Macy’s Santa, though. Macy’s department store and Santa Claus are pretty much joined at the hip, so it’s only appropriate that they have a Santa. But as it turns out, the flagship store on 34th Stree in Manhattan has *two* Santas on the job at any time. One right out front… standard white-guy Santa. The other… a black Santa, sorta hidden away in the back. They don’t advertise him; you have to ask for him, and of course, you had to know about him in the first place.

It makes sense to have the two Santas well separated. Don’t want to confuse the kiddies. But hiding the black one in the back… well, that might not go over so well. And why have one if you’re going to keep him kind of a secret? Still, I gotta give Macy’s props for having the two. It’s business *genius.* Macy’s is not in the business of giving children magical Christmases, they are in the business of selling stuff. And to sell stuff, they have to bring people in. And if giving children magical Christmases brings people in and they buy stuff… well, there ya go. And like it or not, children of all ethnicities like seeing their own ethnicity represented. So a black Santa makes *all* kinds of good business sense. There is an interesting article with photos here:

Fear of a Black Santa

Footage provided of both the white and black Santas. You know what? The black Santa looks *better,* though the white Santa has the better “Santa Voice.”

[youtube 1KZ7iEYBV1U]

White Santa, black Santa… whatever. Just so long as you don’t halfass it.And please don’t shoot black Santa while he’s out doing his thing. That’s lame.

Besides, we all know that the *true* Santa is green.