Sometimes you can tell that a book or an article s going to be Not Quite Right by subtle hints revealed in the first few sentences. Take, for instance: A perfect steakhouse experience? Elusive. This is a foodie-snobbery article in the Washington Post. How can you tell it ain’t gonna be right? Here’s the first paragraph:
Eleven years ago, with Washington savoring a boom in steakhouses, I grazed through nearly 20 to determine if there was a best among the lot. While I found plenty to admire, at the end of a three-month steak streak, no single player delivered the Perfect Steakhouse Experience formed by memorable meat, first-class sides, an inviting backdrop and distinguished wine service.
“Distinguished wine service?” At a steak house?
Oh, but it gets better:
A full-press steak experience, including cocktails, wine, tax and tip, runs about $150 a person.
If you’re spending $150 a person on a steak dinner, YOU’RE DOING IT WRONG.
On the other end of the spectrum from this sort of inane elitist “I bet he’s an Obama supporter” food snob: Long-awaited Olive Garden receives warm welcome, where you get a restaurant review for a restaurant that people can actually afford, written by a normal person with normal tastes. And as such, it goes viral… not because it’s crazy, or stupid, or hilariously written… but because it’s normal.