So I saw a variant of this commercial a short while ago. It’s been around for a year and a half or so, and during that whole time it has BUGGED THE CRAP OUT OF ME. Now, don’t get me wrong, I like the song. But the song is entirely wrong for the message. On the surface “come with me now” sounds like a perfectly fine tune for a commercial for a vacation destination. But if you listen to the whole song it’s about some guy trying to sell his soul to the Devil and apparently being drawn down into – or at least tempted into – Hell. Doesn’t seem to me to be the best PR message: “Satan invites you to Orlando.” Of course, with the recent attacks of gay Jihadi Democratic alligators in Orlando, maybe they were spot on.
I wouldn’t be surprised if it’s just me, though. While I am not even close to conventionally religious, it wasn’t for lack of exposure back in my podling days; got my butt kicked out of Bible School for arguing with the teacher about “how the hell do you pack all those carnivores on that little boat for all those months.” And for as long as I can remember there have been two phrases that just creep me right the hell out, for reasons I can’t adequately explain: “Come with me now” and “Come and see.” That last one comes from the book of Revelation from the Bible, spoken by some sort of beast as the world gets bitchslapped by God. I have always associated it with some sort of evil force saying it; the phrase was used thusly in the first season of the “Sleepy Hollow” TV series, uttered by a demon, and in “X-Men:Apocalypse,” uttered by what is essentially an evil mutant demigod.
“Come with me now” and “come and see” both seem like the sort of thing that would be the last phrase heard by a sane mind confronted with Nyarlathotep or some such Lovecraftian horror from beyond. Whatever it is that person sees would either drive ’em mad or outright destroy ’em. Whether Lovecraftian or Biblical, the message is kinda the same: knowledge leads to destruction (remember that tree in that one garden?). And that annoys the bejeebers out of me, and is probably why the phrase gets on my nerves: the idea that there is an invitation to learn, to gain knowledge, but the experience will be used to squash you like a bug. The idea that the safe way is the ignorant way… just doesn’t sit right.
So if you ever read one of my stories and you see someone say “come and see,” you know something really unfortunate is afoot. Best response to it would be:
“Come With Me Now” was performed by the Kongos, a South African band performing in a South African style. Durned if I didn’t think it was a group from Louisiana or some such, though, making music like Cajuns.